New Year

Ah, here it is, the new year.

Welcome, 2012! Looking good.

And so, true to form, I have been working on my New Year Resolutions. 2011 was a pretty good year; tough in some respects, but it left me with a new clarity. A clarity that brings me to actually believe the old adages and words of wisdom and inspiring pins that encourage us to focus less on the material, the superficial, the smoke and mirrors in life, and focus more on what really makes us happy, the stuff that cannot be counted… and yet it counts the most.

So this year I begin, like years before, wanting to be better. But it comes from a different place.

Wanting to be better now doesn’t come from believing that where I am and who I am now isn’t good enough.
It doesn’t come from seeking acceptance.
It doesn’t come from an almost constant “sink or swim” feeling.

And so forget the S.M.A.R.T. goals, the measurable ones, the ones that make me obsessive and even more neurotic. I have found that the best way to get going is to get inspired. So please welcome my assistant Pinterest, ladies and gentleman, who will help me illustrate this concept. In other words, welcome to Pinspiration for the New Year!

 

Something I blamed my unhappiness on in the past was the fact that I lived in Switzerland. I was always ready to admit that Switzerland is beautiful, but I found it cold, both in climate and in character, and I didn’t like the language; I missed my favorite shops and hated that they didn’t exist here, I hated how hard everything seemed to be.

And yet once I stopped resisting it and let it all wash over me, the language, the sometimes less-than-friendly attitude, the local shopping choices, the food, everything…. I found it didn’t bother me nearly as much. It stopped being a fight and it just started feeling normal. I wasn’t resisting it anymore, so it didn’t feel like an imposition.

And if living in the moment means stopping and wishing you were elsewhere and enjoying being exactly where you are now, then Switzerland, Zurich, is exactly where I am meant to be.

So this year I am going to do just that: live in the moment and enjoy being here. I am going to make a life here. And if sometimes I wish I could be somewhere else, so be it. That’s more than natural, and I’ll just have to focus on quenching my inborn wanderlust by visiting one (or more) of these amazing places:

Prague	Berlin
Rome	Paris

Another thing I often blamed my unhappiness on in the past was my weight. So I spent years dieting and punishing myself, and wishing I didn’t enjoy cooking and eating delicious food quite as much as I do. And I only made myself more miserable.

But… surprise! I didn’t lose any weight this year, in fact I may have even gained some, and yet I am happier and more serene than I ever remember being.

So my New Year resolution isn’t to swear off all delicious food and workout obsessively. It’s to take care of myself. It’s to be kind to ME. And if that means an Easter brunch with the family, so be it. But if food turns into a drug, something not enjoyed but grabbed out of stress or boredom, something you use to drawn your sorrows or not face that upset… that’s not being kind to myself, it’s not living in the moment. It’s a reaction to fear and uncertainty. And the best way to handle that isn’t to stuff my mouth with pastry, it’s to face things head-on.

Luckily I figured out that the best way to snap out of a funk is to be creative. I always thought that writing was the only way I could do that, because of my craft-impairment – but another awesome creative outlet I have found is photography. My dad, who has always been a passionate photographer, couldn’t be more excited. He told me he thinks this is perfectly fitting, since photography is simply writing with light.

It does have a kind of poetry, doesn’t it? All I know is that I love it, and this year I want to do more of it. In fact, I am thinking of joining one of the Project 52 or Project 365 (366 this year!) challenges, like the one on MCP Actions or on Lasso The Moon.

I also plan on going out for “photo walks” in and around Zurich on a regular basis, so if you are a local and you want to join me, just get in touch! I’d love some company.

Other than that, I am easy. I won’t do the whole “I am going to keep a tight and regimented schedule on the whole year so things don’t spiral out of control and I actually reach my goals” because frankly, I’m over it. It never works, because life happens to be unpredictable and s**t happens. And then I get all flustered and stressed out and… whatever. Not doing that. So you know what?

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